A Path Through

Signs….they are everywhere. I’m not talking the kind of signs that tell you where to turn or stop, or even “suggest” a speed limit. No, I am speaking of the kind of signs that get your intuition tingly and encourage you to take note. For me, my path to my radiation treatment has been full of signs to pay attention to, some obvious, some not so much but all have challenged my timeline assumptions and as always I have learnt a fair amount as I have walked through the experience.

For me, the first sign was when my appointment with my Radiation Oncologist was moved to one week later due to him being sick. Yes, this was the first indication that the schedule that I had in my mind for radiation would be less than realistic.

The next sign would come when we actually did meet and he informed me that I was healing really slowly.  The reality is that four to six weeks of recovery from surgery is when you have a healthy body that has not been beaten up by chemotherapy.  When you add in the impacts of chemo, the body tends to decide it’s own recovery schedule. For me, recovery was moving at a snails pace.  Actually, a snail with a headwind and serious snail arthritis!  As a result of my less than stellar recovery, my physician was uncomfortable about moving forward with radiation until I had more time to heal.  With that, an additional two weeks was added on to the schedule before I could even start the process of preparing for radiation.

Sign number three was my fault as I had it in my mind that as everything had been going so great with all of my results, I would only need a week of radiation …tops!  The reality check that came was proof that I am in no way medically knowledgeable in this area.  Nope…due to all that I have dealt with and this little triple negative breast cancer diagnosis….I was up for fifteen sessions of radiation. 

Sign number four was my education on the radiation preparation process. You see, you don’t just go into a room and they shoot lasers into you. Nope, it is a little less Star Wars than that! You actually have to go through a mapping CT Simulator in which you are set up in the machine and a body cast is made of the position you are in prior to them starting to take measurements. This cast will be with you through your radiation treatment to assure you are in the same position each session. Once completed, CT images are taken to assure that the areas of focus are correct. When the imaging is completed, there is one final step that will confirm that your radiation experience will stay with you for the rest of your days…you get tattooed. Yes, they tattoo the area that the radiation will be focused ( I have three small dots, two on my sternum area and one on my side). This tattoo process is done with a small needle and ink.

Once the mapping CT is done, all of the information goes to a team of medical physicist who review everything and make the radiation plan for treatment. This includes how the radiation is to be delivered and the strength. It is only after the team has done this, that radiation can be scheduled.

As I sat in the office, my head started to calculate the time frames and my heart sank as the hope of being done radiation by the start of November quickly went POOF! Instead, I was looking at a Christmas time frame. Tears sprang to my eyes as I cursed my slow recovery and all the steps that needed to take place. I had such a deep desire to be done dealing with cancer and having it creep into another Christmas season was disappointing….actually it down right sucked. I left the appointment feeling down and defeated….but I failed to realize that Mister Positive Pants (my loving husband) was walking by my side with nothing but positivity on his mind.

Yes, he was confident that the signs would change and be in our favour. He reminded me that he was still very much belted into his lovely pants and had no intention of taking them off yet….and once again he proved how correct he was!

Just two weeks after my appointment I got the call for my mapping CT simulator scan. The scan, complete with getting my new tattoos, took less than an hour. As I was leaving, the technician shared that I should receive a call on radiation dates within two weeks. I will say this comment perked my ears as I was not expecting to hear this. Could we be on track for getting this all done before the dude in red was scheduled to make an appearance by popping down our chimney?! Was this a sign that things were moving in a different direction? Well yes…it was!

Two and a half weeks later the phone call came, we had a date.  Session one of fifteen radiation sessions was set for November 10, 2022.

As I hung up the phone and excitedly called my husband at work to tell him that we had a start date and more importantly and end date, I stopped for a moment. You see, the final sign was staring me in the face. I will complete my radiation therapy the week that I first discovered my lump one year ago.

So here I am, in the final treatment stages of this journey with the end so close I can see it. Then it is on to a path of recovery and embracing this wonderful life I have been given another chance at. But first, I will step into the radiation treatment room to get my “glow on” with my radiation team, and from there I will be focused on a very merry Christmas free of cancer treatment!